A year ago, I realized that I had never fully accepted my autism diagnosis from 2018. At the time, I was working in a research laboratory and was focused on healing my body and the numerous health issues I was experiencing.
In March 2022, I began working at an electronics store as a salesperson, a job I had always wanted. It was the perfect opportunity for me at the time for my healing journey, but I soon realized that I wanted a job that had a greater purpose in my life, something that would allow me to fully develop myself. This led me to explore the idea of returning to science and research, as I hold a PhD in biology.
After some time, I realized that I enjoyed science, but I was also passionate about being a life coach and an artist. I lacked clarity on which path to pursue, so I took the time to heal and align with myself. It is only when we are at peace with ourselves that we gain the clarity we need. Through this process, I quickly understood that I didn't have to choose between my interests and could pursue all three without sacrificing anything. Yes, but where to start then?
In the Teaching of Union, they often mention the concept of "low-hanging fruit," which means starting with something simple that you already know well. I decided to focus on what I knew well, which was science. Although I was still interested in being an artist, I hadn't finished my training as an illustrator-designer, so I set it aside for the time being. As for being a life coach, I am still in the process of healing from my autism diagnosis, and having my brain wired for perception rather than social. So, I didn't feel comfortable investing heavily in that path yet, and as a result, I decided to pursue my career as a scientist.
Looking at my options, I found it challenging to leave any of these three jobs behind and return to my previous scientific career. It felt like a step backwards, as I had given up on that career at the end of 2018, and it wasn't a pleasant experience.
I wrote a Love List for my ideal job, outlining:
My values: efficiency, speed, innovation
What I receive: support, creative outlet
What I bring: innovation, solutions, vision
The environment: comfortable, clean, calm
The coworkers: family-like atmosphere, cooperative, supportive
It was then that I realized that being an artist, coach, or scientist all fulfilled my Love List criteria! And that’s when I realized how much I missed solving complex problems.
As a result, I became even more invested in finding a job as a scientist, but I faced a dilemma. Should I return to working in a university laboratory or join the pharmaceutical industry? I had to work through a lot of resistance regarding the pharmaceutical industry, which is a common sentiment in France. Many believe that these companies only care about profits and do not genuinely help people. Essentially, I had learned that it was impossible to find Love or God in such a field. But I realized that this was just a limiting belief that needed to be healed. In the end, we can choose to see God wherever we want to see Him. Ultimately, I realized that the industry offered more structure, but the university provided more freedom. And this freedom of expression is more important so I came to the conclusion: either university or start-up. I need to be in an environment where rapid innovation is a top priority.
The next issue I had to address was whether I wanted to return to working in a research lab or be in an office setting. Eventually, I found peace with this decision, and recently, God reminded me of my dream during all those years of studying biology: to work in a military laboratory. Even just thinking about it now brings me a great deal of joy and excitement. I realized that in Switzerland, where I currently reside, it is quite possible to work as a scientific consultant for the government or even for the military (as there are many job openings available). So, this became my goal for my scientific career. The question then was, how do I achieve this goal? To be honest, I am not yet ready to become a scientific consultant for the government, as I lack sufficient experience. Suddenly, it became clear that I needed to return to the laboratory, not just to an office or to managing clinical trials, but to my previous research career that I left a bit in a hurry.
And that brings us to March 2023, where everything became clear about what I wanted in my ideal job. Do you know what the next step was? To leave my apartment, which required too much energy to maintain and where I felt stagnant. For the past two weeks, I have been staying in a temporary apartment that is not my dream accommodation at all, but it will suffice for one or two months, and most importantly, I feel better there than in the previous one. I know this is a crucial step because I am not just manifesting my dream job but also the lifestyle that comes with it, including a new apartment. It took some time to figure out which city I wanted to move to, but as I healed, I stopped compromising and realized that I could have it all without sacrificing anything. That's why I decided to return to Zurich, the city where I first arrived in Switzerland. Zurich is a vibrant city with a great energy that resonates with me. I feel good and supported there, and there is an amazing lake!
As I write this blog post on April 15, 2023, I cannot say for certain what my next step will be. What I do know, however, is that my dream job and perfect apartment are just around the corner. I feel it, and I know that I have worked through the wounds and blocks that once stood in the way of this ideal life. My physical reality is currently aligning with the healing work I have done, which can be chaotic at times as I sort through old things and make room for the new. Nevertheless, I am feeling good and at peace, which is what really matters.
And that is how you know you have healed.
As you can see, manifesting something can take time depending on what needs to be healed and your own progress. For example, it took me 10 months of working with Twin Flames Universe to enter into Harmonious Union and be with my Twin Flame. Now, I'm almost 13 months into even more intense healing to manifest my dream job in science, and I still haven't seen the physical manifestation in my reality.
Why is there such a difference?
I always knew my Twin Flame was real, but I never imagined that I could have them in this lifetime. So, I focused on my life purpose and serving God. After joining Twin Flames Universe, I did a lot of work to claim my Twin Flame and heal what I needed to. I had a false Twin Flame for six months before I completely let go and focused solely on myself and my life purpose (where I was asked to focus). That's when I reached Harmonious Union. Having my Twin Flame in my life was the natural step to be able to heal to the level I am at today. It was the foundation I needed to build the perfect life that I always desired.
The majority of the healing work I did up until this point was more focused on my direct relationship with myself, money, and work. In my case, having my ideal job in science (which is only one part of the full career I desire) takes time because I want perfection. I don't want to change after a year; I want to build something. And because I have many wounds surrounding perfection in this area of my life, I have a lot to heal to align with it.
We are all different, and we all have our own experiences. Therefore, it's important not to compare yourself to someone else's journey. Where you are now is already perfect because that's where you build where you will be later.
There is so much more to say, so join us here at @myr_beyourself or in French at @autismewithlove.
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